Personal Musings

DON’T DOUBT.

Time really flies, huh?

It’s already been 1.5 weeks in Australia (after being away from it for over a year…crazy!) and in a few days I will say goodbye, yet again to go back to my current life in Seoul. I want to go back, its been a crazy tiring time of medical appointments (of which I will not go into) and a billion catch ups; but it was good to see my family again and friends. God is good!

I spoke on prayer at my church service last weekend; so I thought I would share what I spoke on here. Nothing particularly new or revolutionary, but its from my heart and my own experience. Enjoy:)

“Thankyou for inviting me to share today; I think what I am sharing may not be new to a lot of you, but these are things that God has opened up my eyes to more than ever in the last 2 years, and it doesn’t hurt to hear it again.

So I have a question for you – who here has a wife or husband? How about a boyfriend or girlfriend? What about a crush? Who has friends? Those who don’t, its okay, you have Jesus! He’s the best one of all. Anyway! The point I’m trying to get at is, how do we get to know people that we want to eventually build a relationship of some sort with? We talk to them right? We seek their company more frequently, and want to be in their presence.

Like any human relationship, it is the same, if not even more with God. Like our fellow brother in Christ Jeremy Lin said, “to know Him is to want to know Him more”. If we are to know WHO God is and what He wants us to do in this life, then we MUST seek Him more. So, how do we do this? We PRAY. Our communication with the Father is through prayer, seeking His heart through our prayers, and our time devoted to him. And like any other relationship, the more time we spend in His presence seeking him, and praying, the more that we start to understand his absolute majesty, and all the wonderfully crazy things he can do in your life.

The Bible tells us to be in prayer constantly and without stopping. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 tells us, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” and Romans 12:12 “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”

We also know that the bible is a VITAL supplement to prayer. 2 Timothy 3:16 tells us, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness.”, so we KNOW that in conjunction with prayer, the Bible gives us written proof of God’s character. Not only that, but you have a backing to what you believe, if someone comes up to you and asks you WHY you believe.

To be honest, in my years as a Christian before I left for Korea I barely picked up my bible, aside from using it to check sermon references in church or lifegroup. I always thought “Yeah, I probably should try reading more…” but that thought would never develop into an action, and consequently my lack of understanding and intimacy with God led me to always struggling to believe the validity of my faith in Christ – because I had no semblance of what an Spirit-filled relationship with God should feel like.

But in my desperation to find life meaning once leaving the life I knew behind in Australia, I started to go through and read my bible every day, tried to study and understand each chapter I read. And slowly, combined with more prayer, did I then start to see God move powerfully in my life.

So I say to the old Beckii as well as to those of you who here who are not consistent with prayer and reading of your bible, that perhaps wonder WHERE God is in your life and where He fits in (or where YOU fit in) in the grand scheme of battling for Christ in this fallen world; I encourage you to start seeking God earnestly in prayer. The more I prayed, the more I saw how great the spiritual battle is.

Look at the world around us – how frequently is tragedy happening these days? The war between Israel and Gaza; the beheading and killing of Christians by ISIS in Iraq, the massacres in Syria, countless acts of unjust police brutality in America, increased frequency of natural disasters, increased frequency of sex trafficking in adults AND children, mental illness and suicide rising in a money-driven era, secret intelligence forces at work…and the list goes on. Australia is very far away from a lot of these countries, but Korea being a more centrally located country, tragedy is very much real and present – as South Korea experienced a few months ago with the horrific Sewol ferry accident.

So, this can be overwhelming. What should I do? What CAN I do? The worst thing we can do as Christians is to be INDIFFERENT. Because isn’t that what Satan wants us to do? To sit back and live like everyone else? The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. We can see the world changing right before our eyes; and he is doing everything he can to distract you with worldly temptations and obstacles, to prevent you from following Jesus and being used as a soldier of light.

Aside from making donations and physically helping where possible, PRAYER is the greatest weapon we have, as God’s army. The more we pray, the more our will aligns to God and HIS heart becomes OURS. The more we pray, the more prayer will change YOU.

So for those who are unable to pray for themselves, we stand and intercede and pray on behalf of them. For even if the world is Satan’s playground, He who lives IN us is far greater than he who lives in this world. And don’t worry if prayer seems to do nothing sometimes. Like any relationship, it takes time to build up one with God, and to know what His voice sounds like. BUT if you DON’T pray– you won’t know at all.

God created us all differently, BUT he did create us for a specific purpose. We all know how much better it is to do things with purpose, rather than doing something aimlessly, right? And even on those days when we don’t feel like doing anything at all, to have a solid purpose will drive your passion to do more, and greater things.

For me, in my situation right now, to rely on God and remember my purpose in Korea is all I have. It is NOT easy at all. I have no visa, no income at all (a big contrast from my previous high paying job here), Korean is NOT my mother tongue, and due to a lot of constant changing factors the future ahead of me is foggy and unstable. BUT, it is thanks to these circumstances that I have been forced to rely solely on God, and so the blessings when they come are THAT much more beautiful, and life-changing. So much so, that I am truly thankful for all the little things He has done for me even in the crazy chaos and uncertainty that I live in, in Seoul, and my faith has grown ten-fold…

…I believe that God is starting to use hiphop for Christ in a really powerful way in recent years, seeing the boom in popularity of Christian hiphop in the states, as well as the influence of hiphop in general in music and fashion culture…

…God is opening up a lot of doors for me in Korea despite my unstable state of no income and no visa, so I do believe I am to be in Seoul, even though spiritual attacks are occurring, and there are a lot of factors against me right now. I know God is preparing to do some really crazy things, and I already see the fruit and blessings in brothers and sisters around me, and hope those blessings will be extended to me in due time. You know you’re doing a good thing for Christ when Satan starts attacking, haha….”

Don’t doubt. Thats a reminder to myself, too.

Be blessed!

Beckii.

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Passage Musings, Personal Musings

COMFORTABLE IN OUR STRUGGLES.

Do you ever get that feeling when you suddenly get inspired to do something; motivated to do something new, because you KNOW it will be beneficial for you, even if it involves effort and perhaps struggle – yet at the same time, the thought of change and the unknown frightens you; so you slip back into your old habits, because its easier, and because its comfortable?

No? Or maybe its not that you can’t be bothered – but rather dont recognise that there is something about your life that you need to change – and hence its just *HOW* you are, *WHO* you are….or is it?

Going through Luke recently in small group for church, this particular verse has been stuck in my mind for a while…

Luke 18: 35-43 “As Jesus approached Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging. When he heard the crowd going by, he asked what was happening. They told him, “Jesus of Nazareth is passing by.”

He called out, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”
Those who led the way rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”
Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him. When he came near, Jesus asked him, “What do you want me to do for you?”
“Lord, I want to see,” he replied.
Jesus said to him, “Receive your sight; your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus, praising God. When all the people saw it, they also praised God.”

I think I probably didn’t see the deeper meaning of this until a lot later on (my original thought process would have been, “Why does asking Jesus for healing mean this dude has great faith? He’s just asking…”) – but then after some discussion had a lightbulb moment. Or maybe someone just told me. I forget. Bear with me….hahahahaha.

The blind man, like any other beggar, would have had very little money and would have had to survive on what was given to them by a passing pedestrian who took pity on them. Any kind of physical ailment then, would be added leverage to getting more sympathy and perhaps more money given to them. Blindness, although a hinderance, could also be an advantage.

So knowing this, for the beggar to WANT to be completely healed, to WANT to lose that advantage over others despite his money-less condition – believing that healing from Jesus was better (even when others told him to shut up) was a BIG leap of faith. It meant he was willing to step away from the comfort of what he knew, what he knew worked for him, and was willing to step into the unknown (plus additional blessing of actual sight, haha).

What it means to ask for healing and for sight looks different for all of us – maybe its finally quitting that high paying job that makes you miserable; maybe its asking for forgiveness and apologising to someone who you already cut out of your life; maybe its putting down your pride and admitting you made a mistake; maybe its moving overseas to a new life.

For me? SO many things – even in the little things; I remember I used to always tell people (with my poor social skills) that I was tired, tired, tired. “How are you?” “Tired.” “How are you?” “Stressed.” “How are you?” “Tired and busy and stressed.” Doesn’t leave room for stimulating conversation, does it? But that took too much effort. Maybe subconciously I hoped my complaining would lead to sympathy/pity and then that person would care for me more and feel like they would remember me/pay attention to me better? To fill that empty hole in myself where I felt alone and unloved.

Now I know (or at least…think I have a better idea haha) – to live a full, joyous, exciting life is to not be afraid to take that LEAP, to trust God, especially when other people tell you to shut up. To not be comfortable in what we KNOW because its easier than making a change that will help us, even if it means stepping out into the darkness. Because God will not only heal us – but our eyes will truly be OPENED.

 

Point I’m trying to make is? Don’t be complacent in comfort. You’re better than that:)

 

Now to try and not be a hypocrite and do what I said I should do. NO FEAR!

 

Be blessed!

 

 

Beckii.

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